A Smile from A Red Bird

"A smile costs nothing but gives much. It enriches those who receive without making poorer those who give. It takes but a moment, but the memory of it sometimes lasts forever.”

Interesting facts about cardinals (sometimes called "red birds"), they do not migrate, but stay in the same area all year long. The males are very protective of their mate and defend their territory with vigor. They are also considered one of the most attractive song birds by birdwatchers. Biologist have even observed that some cardinal songs are sung with an accent.

Lydia loved red birds, her house was decorated everywhere with ornaments, statuettes and pictures of red birds.  She truly was a fan of this majestic bird.  It is no surprise that the red bird was her favorite, because she was much like the red bird. God was always first with Lydia, but family was next and friends not far behind.  She stayed close to her family, even taking care of her parents. Like the red bird she found comfort being surrounded by her family and friends, defending them at every turn.

Although Lydia did not sing, at least not in front of us, her smile could be considered her song.  It was her smile that attracted people, made them feel at peace and made them feel loved.  Like the red bird's song, Lydia's smile was beautiful and real.  I don't think I have ever heard a bird sing sadness, and I never saw Lydia without a smile.  She could see past a person's defenses and see their heart.  Her smile was contagious.

Lydia cared about people, especially children and adults who struggled.  She wanted to give love to those who felt no love, and she wanted to care for people who felt no one cared for them.  Lydia was definitely a servant of God.

Lydia passed away on October 9th of this year, a sad day for many of us.  A smile that was extinguished for us here on Earth; at least that was what I thought.  It was during her memorial service that the deacon said something that brought a smile to my face.  He said, we must be like Lydia, smile at one another, care for one another and love one another.  He was so right!  We couldn't let Lydia's smile be extinguished, but allow our smiles to be her's. Her smile was a reflection of the Christ-like love she had for people.  We too must have the same smile; a smile that tells people we care, we love them and we are here.

Philippians 2:3-5 says "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but to each of you to the interest of the others.  In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus"

I know that each time I see a red bird, I will think of Lydia and her beautiful smile.  I just hope that my smile can be as radiant as her's.  We love you Lydia and miss you, but look forward to that day when we can see you again, and see that smile.

Chappy

A Letter To My New Daughter-in-Law

"We love because He first loved us"

                                     1 John 4:19

Well you have gone and done it.  You have entered something far different then the Twilight Zone.  You have become a part of the family.  This family is not your typical family; far from it.  We don't allow many people into our circle, we tend to keep to ourselves and we find humor in the dumbest things.  

Getting nervous?

This family did not start on a foundation of God, in fact if you really wanted an idea of what this family started on, you would have to watch the movie Princess Bride, and the travels of Princess Buttercup and Westley through the Fire Swamp.  

Got that image in your head?

You married the eldest of four children, which puts you at the top.  The spotlight is on you, because there are two brothers behind who will monitor your every movement.  Your actions will determine what kind of women they will look for to wed. 

I'm sorry, does that sound like too much pressure?

So, all kidding aside.  Although this family struggled, fought to keep our heads above water, we did find solid ground.  That solidness was a foundation of God.

Whew!  do you feel some relief?

You see, although we may not be your typical family, we do know who is truly in charge.  We may not be the embodiment of angels, but we do understand what it means to love others and put others before ourselves.  We still struggle, we still fall, but now we have someone who has our back.  

We don't take life nonchalantly.  So with that all said, sit firmly in your seat, fasten your seat belt and get ready for the ride of your life.

Welcome to the family, my dearest daughter-in-love.

The Garage Sale

                         "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."  1 Peter 5:7

                    

My wife and I will often take a Saturday morning and look for garage sales.  The fun is finding something you want at a bargain price.  The old saying "One's trash is another's treasure" sometimes holds true, but sometimes "One's trash is just trash".

We all know why we have garage sales, to get rid of stuff we no longer want.  Garage sales are intended to hopefully recoup some cash, and to have someone else haul our "trash" off.  Sounds easy enough, but there is a lot to putting on a garage sale.  Set up tables, price all the stuff you want to sell, put an add in the paper or internet and then running the garage sale.  You have all been there, you say 7am on Saturday and people show up at 5am banging on your door.  Then there is the haggling over prices.  All in all garage sales may get rid of your "trash", but they really are a hassle.  Is there an easier way to get rid of your "trash"?  Sure, pack it away, throw it away, or give it away.

As much as I would like the money, I would choose to give it away.  Giving it to a family in need provides them with stuff they could not afford; clothing, appliances and furniture.  If you take your stuff to a nonprofit, they can sell your stuff to raise money for a need and provide jobs. You relieve yourself of the clutter, but bless others with stuff they will need. Sounds like a win-win to me.

What do you do with your internal "trash" or burdens?  Do you try and deal with it yourself?  Like a garage sale, it takes a lot of work to deal with your own burdens.  A lot of the time you can't solve your problems, and they continue to linger.  You could pack them away.  Which means you will have to eventually deal with it.  They just don't go away on their own.  When you spend more time dealing with your burdens you take time away from things that are important.  You become a slave to your burdens.

How about giving your burdens always?  God wants your burdens, why not give it to Him?  You don't get cash, but you are relieved of your "trash".  What does God get?  He gets a servant who's life is not cluttered.  A servant who can do His will.

1 Peter 5:7 says "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."  Someone who cares enough to take all your "trash" so you can move forward....hmmm......sounds like a win-win to me.

Chappy

Man Up

When I was in my early teens and playing city league baseball, I had a friend who was a pitcher.  During one particular game a struck ball came back towards him, hitting him in the shoulder.  He went down like a sack of potatoes.  The game stopped and he was helped back to the dugout where I was sitting.  My friend was hurting bad and he was crying.  As he was holding an ice bag on his shoulder his dad came into the dugout.  His dad stood over him and told him to stop crying and to Man Up.  His dad never comforted him, nor sat down beside him.  His only words were Man Up.

I tell you this story because of a response I had to my last post.  The person who responded used the words Man Up.  Now I am not sure if the person truly didn't understand my post or his response was like that of my friend's dad.  Anytime you are hurting, you need to Man Up.  Sounds simple enough, but does manning up fit ever type of hurt?

Before I answer that last question, let me first give you my definition of manning up.  A man who takes responsibility for a child he conceived in a one night stand with a woman, is manning up.  A man who works more than two jobs to take care of his family, is manning up.  A father who takes his crying child into his arms and hugs them, is manning up.  You see, what my friend's father did was not being a man.  What he thought he was doing was trying to make his son a man, and not a sissy, by telling him not to cry and to Man Up.

So to answer my question, the answer is no.  You can't tell an alcoholic to Man Up.  You surely can't tell a person trying to beat a drug addiction to Man Up.  Most definitely you wouldn't tell someone who is dealing with depression to Man Up.  What about a person who has lost a loved-one to cancer?  "Hey your loved-one is dead, you can't bring them back. So Man Up!"  Don't get me started about some father telling his thirteen year old son to Man Up.  Can you imagine Jesus telling any of the hurt people He came into contact with to Man Up.  I seriously don't think Jesus would be as popular as He is today if he acted that way.

We come into contact with people everyday with different levels of hurt.  How we approach them, and how we act towards them can make all the difference.  People don't expect answers from you; they want arms to hold them, a shoulder to lean on and an ear that listens.  They surely don't need someone telling them to Man Up.

I have been lucky to have people around me who recognize when I am hurting and give me comfort.  They may do it by providing me a song, giving me a hug or just a few encouraging words.  I know it is God working through them, because it is just what He would do.

"You who have made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again. You will increase my greatness and comfort me again." Psalms 71:20-21

Lightning Crashes

Oh now I feel it comin' back again,

Like a rollin' thunder chasing the wind.

Forces pullin' from the center of the earth again.

I can feel it...

Those of you who know me well, know that I have a serious passion for music.  I love listening to the way lyrics are sang; trying to feel and understand what the artist/writer was trying to convey to the listener. The lyrics that I posted above come from a song called Lightning Crashes by the group Live.  These lyrics perfectly describe my life over the past year.  Just when I think things are going good, I can feel it.  I can feel that sense of an impending obstacle, a crossroads, a hindrance to my path.  So today I throw myself a pity party and your invited.

So my pity party has been going on for sometime, but lately I have been bombarded by lyrics that really puts it all in perspective.  Basically the message that has come through is this:

When you were born, no one promised you an easy road in life.

Now I know, many of you are going to say, duh, but hear me out.  When you were born, your parents  told you they would protect you, and probably for the most part many of you had parents who did just that.  Some of you, unfortunately, had parents who made that statement above clear from day one.  Yet there came a time when you were on your own.  That is when it all started to fall apart.  Okay, that is a little dramatic, but things started to happen that you weren't expecting.  that obstacle, that hindrance, that crash of lightning.  Suddenly there are bumps in your road and as life progress they seem to be more often, sometimes bigger than normal.  Wow this sucks!

Yeah, it does suck, and I am not going to sit here and say I have an answer.  Remember?  I am having a pity party.  I struggle every day looking for an answer.  As a Christian I have prayer and God's Word, but let me be honest with you...I am no where near the type of Christian who can blow through an obstacle coming out the other end feeling stronger in their faith.  Right now I have kind of parked myself in from of my obstacles hoping they might just go away.  I have a fear that if I do somehow make it through the obstacle, there will be another, and another and another..........you get my point.  Like the lyrics say above: Oh now I feel it comin' back again.  Crap.

How are you enjoying the party?  I hate it.  I hate feeling this way.  I guess I shouldn't because no one promised me an easy road.  Heck, even the Bible says once you become a Christian it gets worse; before it gets better. WHAT?!  Maybe that is what I am going through right now, the worse.  Wow, that didn't make me feel any better.  So when do I get to feel better?

I have three saving graces that keep me from drowning in my pity party.  The first is always God.  No matter how deep a valley I am in, how dark it is around me, I know He is there.  Second is my family, they are my rocks. Thirdly, strange as it may seem, is a friend of mine who I wrote about in a previous blog, the gas attendant.  These are my life lines.

So what do you get out of my pity party?  Hopefully some clarity.   Your life path is not perfect, and it won't be, so stop trying!  Stuff is going to come at you from every direction, it's going to block you and hinder you.  How you deal with it will determine if you want to have a pity party, or you want to strengthen and grow.  I have my life lines, what are yours?  Are they helping you?  If not, maybe it's time to look for new life lines.

Well, this pity party is about over.  Thanks for coming and being a part of the party.  I hope I didn't bum you out, that wasn't my point.  I have been bummed out for sometime, and it has really taken a toll on me; mentally and physically.  You don't want to be where I have been.  I want all of you to understand that no matter what comes at you, what forces are pullin' at you, there is Hope at the other end.  It takes strength and courage to move through the mess, and you don't have to do it alone.  Surround yourself with life lines and fight the good fight.

The Gas Attendant

Wow, it has be forever since I last posted!  I guess I am not the best blogger in the world.  I have a lot on my mind, just too lazy to put it all down.

So, there is a place in town where I go get gas.  I have been going there for years because it's close to the house and usually the cheapest prices in town.  At that gas station is an attendant who I will call Jerry.  Jerry is small in stature, but has a heart bigger than most.  What is intriguing about him is his love for people.  He talks to everyone, always has a smile and never has a bad thing to say about anything.  Yet there is something about him that makes him stick out above everyone else.  It is ability to boldly ask any customer if he can pray for them.

Customer's reactions are varied to his requests.  I have yet to see anyone get mad but I have heard about people complaining.  Yeah, they even complained to his bosses; who by the way asked him to stop.  He continues to ask.  The funny thing is, mention the place he works and even mention his name and most people know exactly who he is.  He has become sort of a cult celebrity, but he is humble and shrugs off the attention.

I have to stop and confess that I know Jerry very well and consider him a good friend.  I am privy to some of his personal life, so behind that smile and good-natured aura is a soul that is tormented and hurting.  Yet he continues to care about others, wanting to give others a lift.   Why?  Simply put, He knows he is commanded to love his neighbor as himself.

I am sure you have sat around with your friends and talked about what Heaven will be like, who you will see and how we will all live without pain and suffering.  Well here is what I imagine when Jerry arrives in Heaven.  Jerry will come before the Lord kneeling with his head lowered and the Lord will motion to the throngs of others to come forward.  The Lord will ask Jerry to rise and look around Him.  Around Jerry will be people he prayed for; people who drove away from that gas station changed, people who in someway were directly affected by his obeying God.  There won't be just a dozen, but hundreds, maybe even thousands who will be standing there smiling.  Jerry will look once again upon the Lord who will say those simple words, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

So what was my point of these thoughts today?  Jerry represents what it means to be a Christian.  Putting God first, people second and himself last; and he does it with a smile!  No complaints, no ugly sighs of distress, putting his own pains aside to obey God's commands.  Obey.....

Oh, I have a confession.... I said that I go to that station because of the convenience of it being close and the cheapest prices; that is only half the truth.  I go because sometimes I need to be lifted.  Thanks Jerry.

Chappy

A Conversation with a Gorilla

It has been awhile since I have last posted any of my thoughts. Basically because I have been lazy and somewhat in a depressed state; but something hit me in a dream last night that I had to share.  

First let me give you some background to this dream.  I had a conversation with my wife, prior to the dream, that I wished God would give me the gift of speaking to animals.  I thought that it would be cool to get an animal's perspective on God and the world.  So last night that gift was granted in my dream.

So here I was in some dense jungle sitting Indian style and across from me was this 800 pound, silver-back gorilla.  He was munching on some fruit and we had the following conversation (Now imagine the voice of the gorilla sounding like Wallace from Wallace and Gromit.):

Gorilla, "First time I have ever talked to a human."

Me, "Does it seem strange to you that I can converse with you and understand you?"

Gorilla, "Well at first.  But I have seen many strange things happen around me why should this surprise me?"

Me, "Well I am not going to waste your time with silly chit chat..."

Gorilla, "Thank you, I do need a nap later."

Me, "So I will come right to the point; What do you think about the world?"

Gorilla, "Hmmmm...well the world I know, and the world you speak of, are two different things.  I know nothing outside this jungle, yet I am sure there is more because you don't live in the jungle yet you are here.  You must have come from somewhere; so that somewhere must be in another part of the world.  My world consists of others of my species, other species, food, rain, places to sleep and occasionally humans who think it some sort of sport to watch me all day long.  Do humans watch you all day long in your part of the world?"

Me, "Some people do, but we consider that creepy."

Gorilla, "Creepy?"

Me, "Mmmmm...odd, out of place, strange."

Gorilla, "Ahhhhh, yes, then it is creepy for humans to watch me here."

Me, "Who do you think provided all that is around you? Food, shelter, female partners."

Gorilla, "Interesting question.  I have thought about that before, while I was sitting and eating.  I am sure it is some being who feels it necessarily to give me these things.  I have never seen this being, but its presence seems to be all around me.  I see trees grow and die, fruits ripen at the same time, just as the rains come, and I see many other animals who are not my kind.  Some that run from me, others that do not.  Every day is an interesting day filled with surprises and excitements.  It is a wonderful place this being has created."

Me,"It is, unfortunately we don't know how to take care of it."

Gorilla, "We?"

Me, "I'm sorry, I meant humans.  Humans don't seem to know how to take care of what we have."

Gorilla, "I can see that.  I sometimes see humans take things from the forest that never come back.  Trees destroyed, and animals killed.  Why do humans do that?"

Me, "Because we want more.  We are never satisfied."

Gorilla, "Strange behavior.  I have everything I want right here.  I never take more than what I need and I try not to destroy that which is not mine."

Me, "You my friend have it right."

Gorilla, "So humans are never satisfied?  The being has not provided enough for you?"

Me, "Oh, He has provided plenty, but humans are greedy and wasteful.  We just can't seem to get enough."

Gorilla, "You call the being "He".  You know this being?"

Me, "I know Him through my heart.  He is the creator of everything; you, me, the trees, fruit...everything.  He is the Father....our Father.  All living things are His creation."

Gorilla, "Interesting.  Why is it that humans don't respect what this being has given to them?"

Me, "Free will."

Gorilla, "Free will?"

Me, "He has given us the ability to make our own decisions, even decisions that go against Him."

Gorilla, "I too must have this thing called free will.  Yet I don't have the desire to want more than what I need.  I have happy with what I have and on occasion thank the being."

Me, "I am fascinated that you sense a presence of someone greater than yourself, and that you are humble to your surrounds.  Many humans just don't get it."

Gorilla, "I find it hard to believe that anyone doesn't get it.  Just look around us!  I seen marvelous, fantastic creations that I can't even begin to fathom how they were created and why they act/grow the way the do.  I am provided food, shelter and comfort.  Seriously...where do humans think this all comes from?"

Me, "Many know, they choose to ignore it.  It's a sad world, full of worthless desires, broken dreams, empty stomachs and most of all....no direction.  We strive for that next step, to satisfy our hearts, but it never happens.  Many don't turn to the being, or who the humans call God, for satisfaction."

Gorilla, "I can imagine this being, God, is very angry"

Me, "He isn't angry, He is heart-broken.  He cries."

Gorilla, "Ahhhhh, understandable because you called Him Father.  A Father cries for His children."

Me, "Right."

Gorilla, "Seems like humans need to wake up."

Me, "Yeah........"

Gorilla, "Why are you sad?"

Me, "I am sad because I act out sometimes too.  I am sad that I can't be a better witness for God.  I am sad just thinking of the time wasted by humans for their constant search for empty promises when a greater promise is available to them.  I am sad they are not more like you, one who sees the glory of what God can do."

As I finished my sentence the Gorilla stands up on all fours, yawns loudly.  As he begins to walk back into the woods he stops and says one last thing:

Gorilla, "It is time for my nap.  Do no be sad my friend and do not sell yourself short.  Have you not just been a witness to me?  Your conversation has enlightened me.  Go and have the same conversation with your kind; enlighten them.  Help clear their eyes as you have cleared mine.  Hopefully then they will see all the glory that this being, God, has provided."

Chappy